The Human ATM.

You know that time that your kids are in bed and you can finally relax of an evening? It is perhaps the best part of the day if you ask me. Last night I was reclining in the usual style on the couch. Mr Woog was out in the garage talking to his motorbike while I flicked around, trying to find something to watch.

I heard footsteps coming down the hall which is an event that occurs a dozen times a night, as one of the kids is always needing a drink of water, or to take a piss, or has a sore toe, or needs another kiss, or forgot to tell me something, or cannot sleep.

My son stood next to the couch and asked me a question.

“What happens if you swallow a two dollar coin?”

“Well, you die.” I replied calmly, not thinking…..

Cue hysterical wailing. Someone had swallowed a two dollar coin, it would seem.

I spent the next few minutes convincing him that he was NOT going to die and I don’t know why I said that, it was just a dumb, flippant remark that I put down to sheer exhaustion.

Because I was not deep down 100% sure that swallowing a coin would not be fatal, I Dr Googled it and the results came back extremely mixed. I asked the ever charming and beautiful Facebook crew, thinking that if even one of the ladies suggested hospital, I was going to have to do the dash.

Meanwhile, I called the hospital to find out that there was a casual 3 hour wait in Emergency.

This was all eating into my golden quiet couch time. A few people on FB said I should go to hospital and then someone suggested I call the 24 hour medical line. THERE IS SUCH A THING?

I called it, and immediately got onto Julie, a registered nurse who gave my son an over the phone assessment and got him to so a few little tasks, each more puzzling that the last. Walk in a straight line? Check. Cough? Check. Eat a small piece of bread? Check. Drink some water? Check.

It was concluded that he had not choked and that the money would most probably sitting in his stomach at present. She gave me some clear instructions, which involved a potty and a fork. Julie was just about the most delightful person I had encountered ever, even when delivering me the most revolting of tasks.

So this weekend is expected to be a heatwave, not the most ideal of conditions to be digging through shit.

Have your kids ever swallowed something that was not intended to be food? 
How long before you saw it again.

Hold me…..

You can call Julie on 1800 022 222



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  • Chrissy

    Well not my kids but I did when I was 6. A metal nut my brother insisted I swallow as “my medicine” (we were playing Dr). The advice given to to my mum was much the same, though it involved a potty and a knitting needle. A couple of days later she struck gold!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10200996145017635862 Dotty

    Why do you need to get the coin???

    • http://www.blogger.com/profile/06277907783145360030 :perennial:

      My son swallowed a magnet. We rang the hotline – love them completely. We were told we needed to retrieve the foreign object to ensure it has passed through and not lodged in the intestine. We were told 48 hours and if it didn’t pass then off for an X-ray.

    • http://www.blogger.com/profile/10200996145017635862 Dotty

      Makes sense. So I assume if it’s visible you don’t actually need to fish it out with the fork:).

  • http://www.fitfabforty.com/ Fit fab forty

    I have been on the hotline a couple of times, it seems all the Julie’s must be very helpful. Have a fun weekend panning for gold.

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03796290519634413057 Maz

    When your first child swallows a coin, you rush him to hospital…
    When your second child swallows a coin, you wait it out knowing they’ll pass it.
    When your third child swallows a coin, you deduct it fom their allowance!

  • http://www.blogger.com/profile/03796290519634413057 Maz

    When your first child swallows a coin, you rush him to hospital…
    When your second child swallows a coin, you wait it out knowing they’ll pass it.
    When your third child swallows a coin, you deduct it fom their allowance!

  • SmittenKitten

    I just read this and as a girl guide leader I was once given the most valuable unwanted advice. Go to the shop and by a net sieve. Scoop the poop with the sieve, hold both over the loo then pour boiling water over it. YES it does stink BUT it takes about 30 seconds to see if there is a coin and you don’t have to touch anything.

    Please remember to throw out the sieve once the coin has been retrieved.

  • sunni53

    about 38 years ago my eldest daughter swallowed a two cent coin, two days later it reappeared . And yes I had to poke thru the poo, no ill affects. Happy poking..