About six months ago, Mum asked me whether I would like to chaperone her during a trip to Cambodia and Vietnam. I take this sort of responsibility very seriously and agreed. Because I am a good daughter like that. And ten days away from the circus was appealing.
Last time I went overseas, I packed at the very last-minute and took far too much shit and wore mainly the same thing over and over again. So this time, I vowed to be a bit more sensible.
There appears to be a tendency for me to want to wear leopard print a lot, and I always pack my activewear which reflects my very good intentions to use it, although so far I never have. Yet, those trainers are very well-travelled. It is one of three pairs of shoes that I will be taking. The Boaty McBoatface website also tells me that there is a gym on board, so I will be sure to take a photo of it for you. There is also wifi, so I will take my laptop so I can start to write my novel about a woman trapped on a boat with a lot of old people. I have done a little research about the cruise, and it has left me to believe that I will be the youngest guest on board, by about thirty years. Best I brush up on my canasta skills I think.
I suspect I might break my “no drinking through the week” rule.
I have not been to Cambodia before, but did go to Vietnam on our honeymoon back in 2002. The main thing I remember was an incident involving a bowl of Spaghetti Marinara, a shart and a desperate call to reception in the middle of the night requesting a new set of bed sheets. It was tres romantic!
We are spending a few days in Siem Reap before boarding a lovely teak boat up to Saigon, stopping off at places along the way. In my mind I will eat fresh fruit and look out at the passing fields of rice paddies, do a lot of mindfulness activities, write in my grateful journal every day and do some yoga. But in reality, I will be mainlining strong coffee, demolishing the pastry table, sinking a beer and burger at lunchtime before taking to my bed for an afternoon snooze.
And I just about cannot bloody wait!
Got any advice for a cruise virgin?
And pray to the gastro gods to keep away, many thanks!
I hear that can really kill the cruising experience.
PS Thanks Mum xx