High Maintenence

When you are waiting for your wax lady to knock on the door of the cupboard that has been set up as a waxing station at the back of a nail salon, you have time to ponder things.

Things like, why the fuck am I lying on a plastic sheet covered table, waiting for someone to pour hot wax on me, allow them to rip out rogue hair and then give them hard earnt money for the privilege.

I am not a high maintenance woman.

In my circle of mates, we have a range of maintenance models. I have spray-tanning, botox wielding and hair bleaching varieties right through to the ones who, if they have a shower every second day, they consider themselves groomed.

Sometimes, I look in the mirror (nude after a shower) and think GUUUUURRRRRRLLLLLLL!

I let myself get so out of control with hair and scaly skin and jagged nails and a monobrow and a moustache that there comes a point that I can no longer go about my days looking like a yeti. But again, it is about time. Having a pedicure and a manicure and a waxing “session” seems like a waste of time, but truth be told, I do FEEL better after a little maintenance.

Having said that, this cold snap means jeans and jeans means starting to grow out my winter coat. HUZZAH!

And speaking of hair, did you happen to catch me on the ABC Mornings with Wendy Harmer this morning? You can click here and  fast forward to 1.12, where you can hear Vern from the Central Coast berate me for looking like a man.

When it comes to personal maintenance,

do you tick the high or low box?

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  • Low. Definitely low. Washing my hair once a week – it’s down past my waist now, and frankly, it’s just too damned hard. AND, it’s not oily, so completely unnecessary to wash even every second day. It lives rolled up in a bun most of the time, and I can’t actually remember when I last went to a hairdresser – which is partly cost, and partly because I actually haven’t the foggiest what to do with it at the moment. No manicures or pedicures – nails are soft and flaky and it’s just not worth fussing with – plus, cost. BB cream and a swipe of lipstick, IF I’m feeling like bothering. Legs…well, it’s freezing in Melbourne – nuff said. Looking forward to being able to afford regular waxing again, because I’m lethal with a razor! So, long skirts, long pants, tights, etc…

  • michelle barrington

    Currently I have the desire for high maintenance and the budget for low maintenance. At the moment it is hair done by myself at home and forgoing the mani and pedi till we knock over some debts. The inner me could be pampered all day like most mums.

  • Lifeandlentils

    Def low maintenance. I go for laser rather than waxing. If you find a deal it’s the same price as waxing, lasts longer and is gradually permanent. I am down to two sessions a year.

  • Heidi D

    very low maintenance. I only bother to shave legs if it is so hot that I am forced to unveil them in public. In cold weather I let them go for it.

  • You know which scale I sit on 🙂

  • Low, haven’t touched the hairs on my legs for years. Wearing trousers for what seems like an eternity has rubbed most of those suckers off. I have a pair of tweezers that live in my drivers door and I attack the beard on the school run – don’t need a mirror, I know where my high growth patches are… I’d love to have my eyebrows attended to more frequently than I do but, no budget for that at the moment! I’m presentable, I don’t smell, my hair is clean and my teeth are brushed.

  • Mel G

    Waaaaayyy low….. I use hair clippers on my legs these days instead of razors!

  • merilyn

    low maintenance mrs woog!
    my daughter sent this to me!
    hilarious!
    much love m:)X
    https://uploads.disquscdn.com/images/6dfc3acb280f6be80e7088e7ce9e50a7824a0599005bd850027c014097428b93.png