My Little Blahg

Forgetting Elizabeth Gilbert

Lots of people are getting into the swing of the Christmas Party Season. I know Mr Woog is! And I am busy working out my Chrissy Shopping list.

Sorry, but I am going to be a sarky madam here today.

I have just got back from dealing with my Mother, and her mail, and her bills.

We had a near fall out over the fact that I wanted to just chuck all the junk mail straight into the bin, whilst she insisted she must read it all.

One of the offending items was a glossy catalogue.

(I am going to be all passive aggressive here and not mention their name, and just take the piss anyway.)

I am sure it will not take any large amount of guess work as to the organisation I am having a pop at.

Apparently they are “the ultimate in stress-free shopping!”

Every item exclaims “Great Gift Idea!”

That’s as maybe, but seriously, WHO BUYS THIS SHIT??

A selection, for your viewing pleasure –

So realistic! You reckon? I think not.

Plastic giraffes in dress ups. In your garden. Apparently I will love the “extra touch of charm”. No. No, I won’t.

This is my personal fave. The fluoro green light up snail, which, apparently, is “sure to be a talking point”. Sadly, yes, I think they are on the money here. A talking point indeed.

To be honest, I could practically snip the whole catalogue. But I am sure you can Google it if you want more. (Keep an eye out for the “realistic cat” made into a boot cleaner, or the cheeky cute plastic meerkats – set of 4, no less.)

Cruelty to animals, I reckon.

Tacky naff crap.

BUT, be careful. Whilst I was snipping and giggling and wondering who the hell buys this shit, I came across an innovative little Kitchen Compost Crock (Handy, Clean and Smell Free!)

And lovely husband asked me to score him the 30m tangle free garden hose – no more kinks, knots or tangles! Phew!

We have been innovated.