No Sex Nagging on Mothers Day Please

Dear Mr Woog,

I realise that I am not your mother. But until such a time that the Woogettes get a job slinging burgers or washing cars, the task of the Mother’s Day gift is solely your responsibility. I am giving you over a week to shift your ass gear and get organised

Now listen up. I ain’t no diva. Except when it comes to for Mother’s Day. And like every pushy fat mom on Toddlers and Tiaras says “You will need to bring your A-Game.”

Any complaining about cost or inconvenience and I will be forced to show you the battle scars all over my body as a result of having babies with you. And that will not end well.

It never does.

I give you my very visual guide to what is and is not acceptable when it comes to showering me with gifts on Sunday the 8th May.

What about you?
Are you a Mother’s Day Diva? Or are you happy with a sleep in, a cup of tea and a bit of sex nagging……