Holiday Reading

I had a dream that I recently spent a week in Bali with my girlfriend Kracker. It was almost a wet dream, it was so good.

While I was there, I read a book every day which is something I never do back in the real world. And that is because I have an unhealthy and shameful addiction to really bad reality television on the E! network.

One Day by David Nicholls

My friend Mrs Finlay implored me to read this book. And she also has an unhealthy addiction to bad television so I knew it must be good. It tells the story of Emma and Dexter, mates who met on the last day of University and how their lives entwine from then on. I cannot believe a bloke wrote this book. Knocked it off in a day. Laughed and cried and loved it.

Rating – 5 cocktails. BUY IT HERE.

Are you there Vodka? It’s Me. Chelsea. By Chelsea Handler.

I am going to declare and interest here and say that I love Chelsea Handler and would totally turn lez for her. But she is a bit scary. She takes “keeping it real” to the next level. Sometimes when I am writing, I have to stop if I am doing a saucy or un/pc topic and think “What would Chelsea do?” And she would not only write it, but it would be peppered with the c-word. This new book is another collection of piss your pants memoirs. Worth buying just to read about the time she spent in jail.
Rating – 4 cocktails BUY IT HERE

Bossypants By Tina Fey

So ok, I have a think for super funny American Female writers/tv producers. Bossypants is another collection of tales from Tina’s childhood, through to her time on Saturday Night Live and her infamous appearances as Sarah Palin. Tina Fey is a genius and writes like a genius on crack. If you do not love Tina Fey you need to be medicated. With chapters entitled Remembrances of Being a Little Bit Fat, There’s a Drunk Midget in My House and Peeing in Jars With Boys, you just know you are going to laugh your nuts off.

Rating – 4 Cocktails BUY IT HERE

Why Do Men have Nipples? By Mark Leyner and Billy Goldberg MD.
A handy little guide that answers the big questions. Such as Why does asparagus make your wee smell? Is it possible to lose your contact lens inside your head forever? Why do people seem more attractive when you are drunk and Can you really explode from eating too much? All of these questions are likely to be asked of me by my kids and I want to be armed and ready so they will continue to think I have the answer to everything.

Rating – 2 Cocktails BUY IT HERE

So there you have it. A wrap up of my holiday reading. Have you read any of these? Have I inspired you to read any of these? And Why are you hungry an hour after eating Chinese Food?