An open letter to Lindt Chocolate. cc Combantrin.

Dear Lindt,
I am aware that companies are always looking to diversify and expand product lines to increase revenue. I know this as Tim Tams now come in 13 varieties, including cheese.

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Which led me to come up with a concept that will have you working with the pharmaceutical giant Johnson and Johnson to tap into some of that sweet market.
Over the weekend,  I watched one of my offspring absentmindedly scratch at his ass for long periods of time.  I whisked him off the the local chemist where the lovely lady suggested that he has worms and sold us a family sized block of Combantrin.

Combantrim is worm poison disguised as chocolate. The chemist suggested the whole family be dosed up.  By this stage I was fairly green with the thought and wondered how my husband,  who is currently in Japan, was going trying to scratch his ass through his ski pants.

On return home,  I cracked open the family block of Combantrim and distributed 4 small squares to the children,  who woofed it down like it was nobodies business.  And then I read the back of the pack to discover that I had to eat 7 squares.

This is where you come in.

I feel the need for your people to get together with the Combantrin people and come up with a way to add more chocolate and less worm bait to this product.  The “chocolate” crumbled and fizzed in my mouth. The salty, grainy texture made me think if indeed I was an incubator for parasites,  perhaps it was a better option than having to ingest 7 squares of Combantrin.

Woogs are now worm free, apart from Mr Woog who will be assaulted with 7 squares when he walks in the door.

I was thinking, like Tim Tam, you could even work on coming up with flavoured Combantrin. Chewy Caramel? Or Combantrin Lindt Balls? I could easily eat 7 of those sweet babies.

Thanks for your time,

Mrs Woog
xxx