Appliance Porn

You know how salad is supposed to send you into a spin of awe and wonderment……….

“And then I said Put the dressing on the side but she left it off altogether!”

“After lunch I am going straight in for a colonic.”

“Gotcha! You cheeky tomato…. hahahahahahaha!”

“I just finished my yoga class.  I totally deserve these calories.”

“Tastes amazing after that cone I just pulled”

“Salad is like my crack”

Well I am here to tell you that if greens do not get your juices flowing all is not lost.  There is another simple subject that may be the secret to your happiness!

House Porn! Specifically WHITE GOOD PORN!

I was sitting in a waiting room today… waiting… waiting, when I started to thumb though house porn mags.  You know the ones.  They have titles like Inside Out,  Real Living, House & Garden but none called Dead Cockroach Under the Coffee Table.  Anyway,  I was flicking around and I notices a LOT of ads featuring women looking VERY pleased with themselves for choosing a new set of blinds and other housey stuff so wisely.


This lady is thrilled with her new tap ware
“You can all go and bite me.  Look at my kick ass new fridge!”
“My husband got it for me for our Wedding Anniversary”

The ONLY way to celebrate your new Luxaflex Blinds!

SHUT THE FUCK UP! Ta Da!!!




Thank you to the Advertisement Agencies and the White Good Manufacturers for getting it so right.  There is nothing us housewives love more than a good plug in.

Which household appliance sends to into a spin?
Or do you prefer salad…..
and please have a crack at captioning this!

Image from Carpet Court