Bullshit

Yesterday I took delivery of a parcel addressed to Mr Woog.  It was an unusual shape and so I put this photo up on the WoogsWorld Facebook page, asking for suggestions as to what it might be.
Something with which to mock him forever more?
Body by Jake Ab Blaster 5000??
Is it mechanical?? If it is, I want an invite to the party!
a skateboard?
the start of a mid-life crisis?
Fallopian tubes and a uterus?
New sex toy?
Newcastle knights paraphernalia?!
Mr Woog is a funny man.  Not really “haha” funny but funny as in strange (and a bit haha). He can complain about how broke we are and then drop a wad of cash on things such as a fancy 5 Star Worm Farm Hotel,  a new designer man bag or bits of metal things for his motorbike.  Yet I purchase a pair of Sambag Ballet Flats and he questions my motives.
Perhaps the only thing we argue about, apart from whose turn it is to do reading with the kids, is money.  But from what I gather from speaking with my mates is that this is a universal trend that stems back to the time that Antony asked Cleopatra to stop dicking around on the StrawberryNet website and that she did not need all that makeup.
If you are a man and you are reading this,  listen up.
WE DO NEED THE MAKE UP AND THE BALLET FLATS.
But you sure as shit do not need a massive tin bull called Bruce.
So,  what is the last stupid thing YOUR partner bought?