Pants I try to avoid.

only one stomach muscle was harmed in the taking of this photo.

So we all know that we do not wear leggings as pants once you reach the age of 6, but there is a place for leggings in a modern gals wardrobe. Nice, fuss free leggings.


Not like my latest legging purchase, pictured above.


I was in Melbourne being a corporate fish wife a few weeks back when I went shopping. I stumbled across a rack of leggings on sale and picked me up a pair. Of leggings. With gathered ankles. Because I took leave of my senses momentarily.


Since then, I have come to understand WHY there was a full rack of these leggings on sale. Because no one in their right mind would want to walk around looking like they had elephantiasis on the ankular area.


I already suffer from kankleitis, where your calf slides into your ankle causing you to have a less defined version of an ankle. My left kankle is actually quite pronounced due to a break about 15 years ago when I fell over as drunk as a skunk I was training for the Olympics. I was in the hurdles.


So now I have a pair of unworn leggings that I can pull out should I ever want to enhance this trouble spot.


It reminds me of the time where I was walking into a shopping centre. As I approached the glass doors, I noticed that a woman was walking towards me. She looked a lot like me! She could have been my twin, apart from the fact that she had forgot to put her pants on that day, so she was not as smart as me as I was panted properly in a pair of beige pants………. wait…..


That daft bitch WAS me!


Those pants were quickly donated to Vinnie’s so someone else could get about town looking pant-less.


So now there are two different types of pants I need to avoid. Ok, make that three of you want to include pants that come under the umbrella of HOT.  Gathered ankle leggings and beige pants. Soon there will not be much left for me to get around it. My doona cover mumu idea might even work. With gumboots, naturally!

So tell me, dearest. What is one item in your wardrobe that clearly has no business being there?