Flower Porn at DJ’s.

Yesterday I broke with my Thursday Mundane Tradition of wash,wash.wash,fold,fold,fold and went into the city. You see, I had to return a certain pair of pink pants.

After the straight forward transaction, I wandered across to David Jones. I had been invited to witness Miranda Kerr standing on a stage, receiving the first ever fancy new David Jones/Qantas/American Express credit card, and you just cannot pass up such interesting opportunities when they arise.

May I just say, visiting David Jones in the springtime is just a treat. The store looked stunning. Behold some impressive Flower Porn!

people waiting to see Miranda Kerr hold the card.


There was a large media throng (throng is the right word yes? It looks weird…) and they were all getting themselves quite worked up about seeing Miranda hold the card… and then…

MIRANDA HELD THE CARD!


I was sitting next to this funky lady while Miranda held the card, and I said to her “She is an example of someone who won the Genetic Jackpot Lottery…” The lady agreed. It turned out the lady was one of the buyers for David Jones, Donna was her name, and the conversation quickly turned from Miranda holding the card to the fact that she might just have the BESTEST JOB IN THE WHOLE WORLD! Shopping for a living.

Donna gets to travel the world and select what goes into the store. she asked what I did, and I told her I was a blogger, but enough about me, tell me more about THE BESTEST JOB IN THE WHOLE WORLD!

Donna was about 50 and had the funkiest outfit on I ever did see. I suspect HER husband would wear pink pants. We talked about handbags for a bit and she said that I simply must go and have a look at the new Celine Bag because every lady must own one.

The presentation wrapped up and Miranda was whisked off the stage after a thousand photographers had finished bleating MIRANDA MIRANDA MIRANDA STRAIGHT DOWN THE MIDDLE GET OUT OF MY SHOT DICKHEAD MIRANDA MIRANDA. I thanked Donna for our chat and immediately went over to see the bag that I must own to be complete.

Sorry Donna. It just ain’t ever going to happen….

But perhaps even better than looking at expensive handbags and watching Miranda hold the card and talking with Donna was watching the hoards of little old ladies dressed up, wandering around looking at the flower porn.

Fast forward 30 years and this will be me and my sister Mrs Ryan. I will be the one in the beret, as I am more likely to take a fashion risk then she is. And she is more likely to be taking the lead because she is bossy. And I am likely to be living in her spare room by then, so I will do as she says.
Happy Spring!