It’s Getting Old.


When I was a kid, I remember going to family parties and running amok until I basically fell asleep standing up. My parents used to put a blow up mattress in the back of the High Ace and tuck us all in there before returning to their casks of wine as Leo Sayer blaring from the turntable.

The next thing I would know, I would wake up in my own bed and my parents would  not appear from their room until around midday.

Apparently, years later I found out, they would use the white lines on the side of the road as a guide to get home in one piece, which was great considering the fact that neither of them could see straight.

This behaviour was so normal back in the day, but in 1982, the Federal Government introduced Random Breath Testing.

How will you go when you sit for the test?

Will you be under .05, or under arresst?

We used to sing that little ditty over and over, which must have driven the oldies mental. The Party was OVER!

I thought about this last night. I have some mates staying up at Jabba the Hut. We enjoyed a bottle of champers, a cheeky vodka and some wine over dinner. At 8.30, I looked at the TV Guide and was delighted to discover a Guarding Tess, a delightful film starring Nicolas Cage and Shirley MacLaine was about to start.

I think I might have even rubbed my hands in glee. I fetched my blankie, propped myself up onto the couch with a nightcap and watched the movie. I even muted the ad breaks. It was a sad and sorry state of affairs that one so *ahem* youthful should say something at the end of the movie like… “Off to bed! I hope you all sleep well….”

As I look back on a couple of my recent behaviours, is has in fact hit me that I am getting old. When I am shopping, I will feel fabrics and say things like… “That is going to crush terribly…” Mr. Woog and I comment far to much to each other about the quality of our slumber and the biggest indication?

I have become obsessed with the weather forcast.

I am most certainly a disgrace to my party hard parents and their devil may care, lax attitude to child restraints and safety.

So will you please excuse me while I go and make a devon sandwich and a cup of tea.

What was the first sigh that you noticed that make you realise that indeed, you are getting old?