How to buy a washing machine.

Never in all my days did I realise how passionate people were about their washing machines, but I am starting to understand why. Because I have become that person.

One of the great things about having a Facebook Page connected to this blog, is that I can use it as my instant market research vessel when it comes to getting opinions on big ticket items that one must make on occasion. It is how we ended up with Sonia Kluger, and how we were steered in the direction when it came to replacing our washing machine that died in the ass yesterday.

In the marketing biz, it is called word of mouth advertising. All marketers want in on this hype in a big way, but you cannot manufacture it. It needs to be authentic, which is why social media is the place to be. Your social currency is measured by your authenticity. I know a bit about it as I started blogging at the time when people were starting to look at the digital space for information.

I recently read Jonah Berger’s book, Contagious. A fascinating science exists behind building word of mouth.

Anyway, I digress. Lets get back to the issue at hand.

I had bought a washer/dryer combo because of my laziness and let me tell you… DO NOT BUY A WASHER/DRYER COMBO BECAUSE OF YOUR LAZINESS! Take it from me, it might just be the worst domestic decision you make. It took HOURS to get through a cycle and never really dried anything. It might have worked for someone who lived in a nudist colony, but not for your average family of four.

So when it started making complaints and flashing lights at me, I took it has a sign. A meeting was had where we discussed, what Mr Woog refers to CAP-EX, and allocated a budget for said washing machine. It was not in the fancy, shcmancy category which was fine, as I don’t own any Alex Perry dresses.


The hundreds of Facebook Suggestions were discussed and considered before we went off to the Local Good Guys. I found the washing machine area before locating a sales lady. I looked down into her knowledgable eyes. They were the eyes of a woman who had sold hundreds of washing machines. I told her of my requirements and asked whether she had any washing machines without agitators, as I had too many agitation’s in my life and did not want to add another.

She told me that she would not suggest not having an agitator, and I didn’t question her. I had instant faith in her. She lead me to her preferred machine. It was within the budget. Mr Woog started to get out his tape measure, but before he could begin to get to work, she rattled off the dimensions.

The transaction went smoothly. A huge mountain of a man lifted the washing machine into the back of Sonia Kluger. We drove home and proceeded to spend 45 minutes fighting and lifting the machine into place. Mr Woog plumbed her in… and get this.


We even put it on a hot wash. The amount of washing that can be done in this machine is PHENOMENAL. We have walked past her, stroked her and stared at her in wonder. A friend came over, and I immediately took him in to meet her. It is a game changer of the highest order, and one that I cannot believe I have waited so long to have in my life.

Some may call me pathetic. Some may call me a little deranged. But goddam it, I am in love with a whitegood, and I do not care who knows it! So welcome to the family Fisher and Paykel Washsmart 9kg Top loader. May we be happy together forever more.

This is not a sponsored post in any way, shape or form. Thank you for your assistance and help, universe.

Have you ever been in love with a whitegood? What should I call her?

What sort of washing machine do you have? Does it behave itself?