When did I become this person?

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My sister Mrs Ryan had the worlds most shithouse Mothers Day. It is not my story to tell, but it involved her spending a lot of time in medical facilities, tending to members of her family. Everyone is fine now, but I spoke with her in the early evening. She was under the effect of several champagnes when she declared she had “The worlds worst Mothers Day…expletive, expletive, expletive “ and I was not about to disagree with her. So I am stealing her away for a weekend up at Jabba with a few of her mates, to give her a do-over.

Because DO-OVERS cancel out crappy days. Had a shocking birthday? Schedule in a d0-0ver. It is a completely legit thing to do.

I spent Mothers Day morning at the rugby. I stood alongside some of my mates as we shot the breeze, ate a sausage or two and watched our team play. I came away from the conversation thinking “When did I become this person…”


Well I must have commented on the gloriousness of the weather at least six times. When there was a pause in the conversation, I would quip in with “How beautiful is this day!”


We also had a very in-depth conversation about the various aches and pains in our bodies. And how they got there. We spoke about blood pressure. We spoke about veterinarians. We lamented the situation regarding the ridiculous traffic around Chatswood at 5pm on a Saturday and I told them how we needed to get Horatio new football boots and left it till the last minute. Apparently the whole world had the same idea and the streets were as gridlocked as an LA highway after an earthquake. I told them how Mr Woog completely lost his rag and I got out of Sonia Kluger with H, telling him to go home and take a massive fucking chill pill, and we will get a cab home.

Mr Woog does not do traffic jams well.

My friends all sympathised. Did I mention that they were all men? They too joined in the conversation about how they were trying to get into the shopping centre to get MD gifts and how stressful it was. And then we started discussing the best places to park.

When. Did. I. Become. This. Person.

The person who plans their life around various obstacles that MIGHT spring up. The person who rubs their hands in glee when presented with a nice, hot cup of coffee. THE PERSON WHO TAKES PRIDE AT HOW THEY CAN PEG OUT THE LAUNDRY.

The person who wants to throw things at the car radio during talkback and there person who thinks that a restaurant booking at 8.30pm is far too late.

Truth is, I do not know when I became this person. It kind of snuck up on my in my thirties and BANG! Am now a fully fledged fuddy duddy.


Do you know what I am talking about?

Are you this person? What do you do to think that you might just be?

Ever done a do-over?