My Kryptonite.

Screen Shot 2014-06-23 at 7.54.19 AM

I even bought a sign.

That one thing. That one thing that drives me bonkers. Well, actually there are many things that drive me bonkers if I could be completely honest. Empty toilet roll. Dirty dishes that are packed into a clean dish dishwasher. Having no dryer during stretches of less than ideal weather. Socks. Being a dance mum. But there is one thing that stands out above all others. That drives me to a dar place of built up frustrations and evil thoughts.

Bouncing balls inside.

We have floorboards in this old joint and at any given point, if you were to pause on your mundane tasks and listen, you will hear the THWACK THWACK THWACK of a basket ball in a bedroom. Or perhaps the PING PING PING of a tennis ball against a wall. Or you will find Horatio, wandering around the house with his rugby ball in his hands, absent mindedly throwing it up in the air and catching it again. Sometimes he will drop it, and as they are designed to do, it will bounce awkwardly and unpredictably, into things. Furniture. Television. Cat. And Horatio will cry “YOU’RE GONE PAUL GALLEN!” and “drive me over the touch-line” and onto the couch.


“Get outside!” I will cry. “No balls in the house!”

Balls are banned inside the house. Like hats at the dinner table. And I have even bought a sign for the house so that makes it official.

We all have different levels of tolerance about annoying things. But if you really wanted to piss me off, come over with a bag of tennis balls and drop them all at once onto the floor, kick them around a bit and make sure that you smash a piece of crockery,or glassware.

Lord knows I love kids playing actively, and encourage ball playing. (Apart from tennis against the metal garage door, that also makes me seethe or absentminded hands down pants ball playing while watching other men play with balls on the field on the teev) But for the love of all things calm and relaxed, take it outside fellas.

Balls being bounced inside. That is my kryptonite.

What is yours?

What sends you over the edge?