An open letter to Allan Trinh.

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Don’t you point your finger at me, son. Thanks Craig Wilson for the photo.

Dear Allan,

It recently came to my attention that you have concocted the ultimate recipe for making new mums feel really shit about themselves. You started with blame, added some guilt, mixed it in with some shame, and stirred it all up with your pointed finger.

Oh, and you enlisted the help of the publicist Max Markson to help you spread your message. I can just imagine the meeting you had…

Allan: Max, I would like to drum up my personal training business. How can I do this in a low cost way, but get maximum effect?

Max: Oh mate that is easy! It’s the oldest trick in the book. Just get yourself in the press and tell new Mums that they only have themselves to blame for being fat lazy cows… the lazy cows…

And true to form, this is how it went down.

 CLICK HERE FOR THE VIDEO.

But the thing is Allan, we are just not buying it! We just cannot relate to your message. Even the reporter looked slightly pissed off.

“A lot of new mothers don’t prioritise themselves, they let themselves go, they put weight on, they just don’t care and they give up,” You say… Wise for all your 24 years.

Now that is a generalized statement if ever I have heard it. But ironically, you have managed to get yourself some press (because you are reading this, I suppose), but all press is not good press. You come across as an awkward fella, contradicting yourself here and there. You are not selling a very convincing message.

You see Allan, women are not stupid, or not as stupid as you would hope. Guess what? We already know if we are carrying too much weight. We already know that we are seeking excuses. We know that we are not prioritizing ourselves when we are at home with babies. You wanna know why?

We are just trying to get though the day.

“It seems having a child is a reason to stop looking after yourself.” You say.

Do you really think that this is what we are doing? Having a baby is perhaps the best reason to look after yourself. You are a baby servant, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week. You go down, and the whole lot goes with you. So yes, we may choose to lie down on a pile of laundry while our baby may, but most likely will not, sleep. We might not have a shower for days on end. And we may, occasionally, have social intercourse with another adult. Perhaps you might get lucky enough to have a friendly chat with a door-to-door salesman! Or you could be in the supermarket, holding a screaming baby, who is shitting all over you, while you desperately try to pay for your basket of groceries.

I cannot recall being inspired in these situations to drop and give you twenty.

“I know it’s hard, I hear that from my clients all the time, and I know I don’t have kids, so I do have some sympathy for mums.”

*Clutches heart with both hands…*

Allan! My darling, thank you so much for your sympathy. I know new mums everywhere are tired. Thank you for showing us lazy cows that you do have some empathy in that deep soul of yours.

“But, I think some mums are giving up a little bit too easily.”

KAPOW!

Allan, I do acknowledge that you are trying to grow a business, and it is hard to do in times like these. So here is some free advice.

No sign on fees. No cut of profits. Just me to you.

Select another client base.

You are a young man who is trying to connect with women to spread your message about health. But it is not about health. It is about using shame to gain success, which comes in monetary form. If you truly cared for people, you would use a caring approach.

But instead of going to your potential community of clients and talking to them, you go directly to another source. A celebrity agent no less! Another man who would not have a clue about women’s own relationships with their bodies. A man who advises you to tell women how disgraceful they are. Which you do so, albeit awkwardly.

Women are no longer accepting this sort of crap. We are looking for guidance through understanding. And if and when we are ready to do something about our health, guess what! We will ask for it! We will do it! Our motivation cannot be manufactured. Your message does not work on us. Hopefully there is not some new mum out there, having not slept for 6 months, feeling pretty shit about herself and reads and believes your bullshit.

If something, in any part of my life is not firing on all cylinders, I already know about it. I don’t need you to point it out and make me feel worse.

Regards,

Mrs Woog

(Who attends PT sessions twice a week so she can be honest with her doctor when asked about her exercise routine.)