You look great would you like a cup of tea?

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Recently, despite my love of food and my dedication to shoving it in my pie hole, I got on the scales to find I had lost a kilo! HURRAH!

I went and found Mr Woog to tell him of my good fortune. He then went on to tell me that it was all about exercise, not so much about diet. He told me about how he has to work out every day to maintain his weight and it had more to do with moving rather than cake-holing and that I should perhaps up my exercise and I would see further results.

I stood there. Agog. Who was this person that I married?

So I departed with a few words of wisdom of my own.

“This is a lesson from me to you. Not from a wife to her husband, but as a woman to a man. Never, ever give women unasked for advice about exercise or diet.” 

But I said it with more passion and vigour.

I went on to share the secret line that would hopefully see us married for many more years to come.

He now knows that when I come to him and ask….

“Do these pants give me a camel toe?”

He is to reply with “You look great would you like a cup of tea?”

Or what about “Do you think I should cut my hair short?”

“You look great would you like a cup of tea?”

I go to him… “My hormonal acne is back!”

“You look great would you like a cup of tea?”

I know it might seem a little childish, but you look great would you like a cup of tea, is the only think you should ever say when I question my appearance in front of you. You give me validation and quickly change the subject. Because to be honest, you don’t care than I may have a camel toe, or split ends, or Mount Vesuvius on my chin.

Because you just don’t. And that is why I love you. And thanks for offering me many cups of tea since.

So please share this post with as many people that you can, and lets together, stem the rate of divorce together!

Does your partner really care what you look like?