I’ve got 99 problems but conscription ain’t one.

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Isn’t it great to know that no-one is perfect? I mean, there is a flaw in every soul. Miranda Kerr? Oh she would be irregular in some sort of way. Maybe skin flaps. Or ingrown hairs. Maybe she is a chronic sharter. It doesn’t really matter, but it is nice to know that beneath that dimpled smile, there is something not perfect about her.

This week Kate Middleton showed off her fringe and the world lost its shit about it. It was, and still is, front page news. But is there any mention of her ingrown toenail that she got as a result of cutting her nails mindlessly in front of the television one night? Nope. You will never hear about it. Even though I am pretty sure I just made that up.

Mr.Woog has very short calf muscles which makes him walk funny.

I am slowly becoming as blind as a bat and sometimes I getĀ Seborrheic dermatitis!

Jack was born with a moderate hearing loss.

Horatio is as flat-footed as they come.

Chuy suffers from a mood disorder.

Did you know that Halle Berry has an extra toe on her left foot? Or that Kim Kardashian has psoriasis? Did you know that Bill Clinton wears hearing aids, or that Bob Hope needed a colostomy bag?

We all have a flaw. Some are big, and some are small. So today I want to ask you….

What ails you?

Or are you perfect…