Mrs Woog Reviews – Dafni

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I thought I had found the answer to all my prayers. Watching a television ad for a ceramic hairbrush that straightened your hair with a single stroke? I do not care how much it costed me. I was IN.

And so then I forgot about it, and the excitement dissipated from my body for a week or so until I found myself recently at a shopping centre. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw a shop that sold shavers. It was called The Shaver Shop. But is also sold the miracle brush which was prominently displayed at the front of the store.

SQUEE!

Skippidy dip I did, across that food court and into the store.

“Am I able to try the Dafni?” I asked the bald gentleman who was working there. He was very happy to show me how to turn it on.

“You have to wait for 40 seconds.” He told me. We had a bit of a chat about the phenomena that is the DAFNI, and how they are simply flouncing out the door.

Glen (not sure if real name but looked like a Glen) demonstrated on a mannequin how to use it. He advised that unlike the ad where it is used in the traditional fashion, that you section your hair off and brush from the scalp to the end from underneath.

I was all like “Fuck off Glen Gimme Gimme Gimme” when a customer came in and requested advice on a shaving apparatus. Then I sorted myself out with a bit of DAFNI action, which firstly involved a slight burn to my ear.

I persisted. Glen’s way was not working, and so I brushed it like a normal person might. With each stroke my hair responded in a way that it should not have and by the time I finished, I looked like this…

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DAFNI was not my friend. Mind you I have yeti hair, and not many hair appliances plays nicely with it. Believe me, I have tried most of the things. If you have fine, thin hair, that this may work for you. But not Yeti Heads.

It reminds me of when you see an ad for home waxing kits and the lady sits propped on a bath, dressed in a fresh white robe. She warms up the wax strips in her hands, places it on her legs before giving the camera a reassuring smile. With one smooth move, she rips that strip off and almost climaxes, it feels so bloody good. Then you see her in short shorts, entering a cafe where a hot man is waiting for her.

This my friends, is complete bullshit. I know this because I tried this product once. The pain I felt was akin to a thousand bee strings. I only did one strip.

STOP FUCKING LYING TO US PEOPLE!

And so the lesson to be learnt here is an old one. If it seems to good to be true it 100% is complete bullshit.

For more information about DAFNI, please click here.

Now, I am on the hunt for a good buzzy bullet drinkie thing. Any advice?

What is the latest thing that you bought that turned out to be a dud?