How I am ruining society.

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For those who follow this blog on Facebook, you will know that I have been on the receiving end of a series of abusive letters from one Mr. David Dow. David doesn’t like me because six years ago, I let my youngest son wear dresses. Oh, and he also wore tiaras. Oh and jeans and jumpers and pyjamas. Fairy wings, then there was that time that he wore a fully Chanel inspired suit. he got that from the little girls next door and looked amazing in it.

You should be in Prison and if i was a “somebody” you would be. People like you are ruining society and confusing modern generations and baffling them with bullshit to a point they believe immoral behavior is acceptable. If you think being Gay is natural and not a choice you’re an idiot, you made the choice for your son and it boggles my mind that you have convinced yourself it was His decision to act and dress like a homosexual, what you have done borders on pedophilia. You have a sick mind and need serious help.

Apparently I am going to hell, for being such a shit-house parent.

Yesterday at my Head Doctor, we discussed David. I showed her the letters and she concluded that David had some deep, unresolved mother issues. I feel sorry for him. David is a troll, and they say don’t feed the troll. But does David have a point? Do I have a sick mind? Do I need some serious help?

(I have also purchased a packet of Kingston biscuits for when DOCS comes a knocking and I tell you, it is using all of my willpower not to rip open that packet and do some serious scoffing.)

But back to my dreadful parenting. I think, to keep clarity and consistency, I should share with you some other damaging things I have done to my kids.

  • Last night I attempted to make Mac & Cheese. I followed a recipe and everything but it was foul. I put on a brave face and served it up, knowing that it was an inferior offering.
  • Rugby Season has started, and I have yet to get Horatio a mouth guard.
  • White bread sandwiches! The devils work!
  • Jack didn’t have a clean shirt this morning, so I hung one on a coat hanger and gave it a little spray of air-freshener.
  • On Sunday night, we had breakfast for dinner.
  • I didn’t read with my kid last night as I simply could not be bothered.
  • I am going to Trivia tonight at the pub and I will feast on a Schnitzel while the kids and their Dad have tacos.
  • I made one of them walk home from a mates place, despite the heat. Because I was trying to make Mac & Cheese.
  • I don’t make home-made slice!
  • I give little thought to organic options.

And finally, I allow my kids to freedom to explore who they are. To be their authentic selves. To discover life and lessons within the boundaries which we have placed on them. They are fiercely independent, considerate, hilarious and very, very different. So maybe, I haven’t fucked up at all? Maybe I am not doing such a bad job?

Anyway, dearest David, let me leave you with this…

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OPI BUBBLE BATH

PS. Your grammar is shit.