Living in a hot bed of crime…

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DING DONG barkbarkbarkbarkbarkbark

Oh Hi there! Please come in. I have just popped the kettle on. Fancy a cuppa?

Please excuse the mess. I’ve forgotten, do you take sugar?

Isobel! Get off the couch! Take a seat. Whats been happening in your world?

Me? Well I am shocked to discover that I am living in a hot bed of crime. Why, just this morning at canteen prep, Mrs. Woodley from around the corner told me that last night, some scallywag broke into her husband’s car and pinched his wallet! Why he keeps his wallet in the car, I will never understand, but his credit card was then used up at the Seven Eleven on the highway! Cigarettes and Krispy Cremes, if you can believe that. He has had to cancel everything.

I know, right! Who would have thought that in our little suburb such shenanigans go on. I mean, nothing this dramatic has happened since Mr. Fitzpatrick had one too many after the Bledisloe Cup and wrapped his Aldi around a telegraph pole. Oh and that one time that I had to get all vigilante like over the mysterious case of the dumped dog shit. But really, nothing ever happens around these parts…. We live in a nice neighbourhood full of shiny, happy people…..

Cake? Orange and poppyseed.

Anyway, now that I think about it, it was just two weeks ago when The Winckle family from down the street, they got robbed as well! The three kids bikes GONE! Plus Mrs. Winckle’s SUV got ransacked but she said that they didn’t steal the Neil Diamond CD, which says a lot about their lack of musical taste. Oh and what about that time that Mr. Woog bought a new dirt bike and it got flogged from our garage the next day? Police reckoned it was an inside job, that or someone took a liking to it as he bought it home on the back of the car, on a trailer and followed him home. The bloody thing was not even insured yet. Stolen. As I sat right here, right in this very spot, and worked on my Mummy Blog. Can you believe it?

Yes, it is lucky we do have Isobel now. She is very, very ferocious.

Oh and a while back, Mrs. Goodman’s place got broken into. I cannot remember what they took though, but I believe their passports were nicked.

Oh I know! Long gone are the days when you can pop up to the shops and leave the backdoor open. Mr. Woog’s garage is now harder to get into than a Sydney Pub after midnight, but it is a deterrent I suppose.

Top up? 

So enough about me. Tell me about you….

Have you ever had anything stolen?

Were you LIVID?