2017 Predictions

It is the post that I know you all hang out for every year about this time. What is in store for us. Following the total shit-storm that was 2016 (can we all agree on that ploise) I am ready to predict that 2017 is going to be fantastic.

(Mrs Goodman says that 2016 was crap because the numerals add up to 9. Apparently that is a true thing.)

Anyway, I am reminded to do this post every year when the good people at Pantone releases its annual COLOUR OF THE YEAR! And in 2017, it will be easy to be green.

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The colourfully named Director of the Pantone Color Institute explains….

“We know what kind of world we are living in: one that is very stressful and very tense,“ Leatrice Eiseman, told the New York Times. “This is the color of hopefulness, and of our connection to nature. It speaks to what we call the ‘re’ words: regenerate, refresh, revitalize, renew. Every spring we enter a new cycle and new shoots come from the ground. It is something life affirming to look forward to.”

Cheers to that Leatrice! I can totally get on board with the green trend, although this particular hue is perhaps a bit to school uniformy for me, but I am totally digging the sentiment.

Word on the street is that the coconut craze has been put behind us and in 2017, it will be all about watermelon. This fruit will also be featured heavily in home decor as well. Remember the pineapple? FUGGEDABOUTIT.

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And when it comes to my favourite “ALL THINGS HYSTERICAL” Superfoods, you are never, not in a million years, ever guess what we will all be chugging down.

ACTI-FUCKING-VATED CHARCOAL

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Activated charcoal is said to ease gastrointestinal problems such as diarrhea, stomach cramps, gas and indigestion. Perhaps you have been eating too much watermelon? Anyway, it is going to be everywhere, so brace yourself.

“No one has said the word mauve since 1997 and now it’s back, enjoy that.” So says design trend forecaster Victoria Redshaw. And to that Victoria, I beg to differ! She also suggests that we seek inspirations from her four trend forecasts, named the following.

  • Organic Matter
  • Analogue Workshop
  • Tribe
  • Desert Wanderer

Google it good people. Google it right after you take all the copper, marble and K-Mart knock off furniture out of your house and call the council for collection because, you, good woman, are a disgrace!

And as far as pets go, 2017 will see a growing trend in Tiny Pony Ownership.

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I did a little digging around to see what Nostradamus predicted for 2017, but it was not good news I’m afraid.

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BUT he did predict that 2017 will see the start on commercial space travel, so that’s one to look forward to!

Kale is out. Kelp is in.

Quinoa is out. Teff is in.

Avocado is out. Sweet Potato is in.

Assholery is out. Kindness is in.

Kanye is out. Some chap who refers to himself only as THE WEEKND is in.

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Aren’t you glad that I do this every year, and hold your hand in what can be confusing times. I really hope I have helped you see the light.

What are your predictions for 2017?

Please share your thoughts on GREENERY.