The Most Superior Schnitzel in Sydney

I have tried, God knows how hard, to sample recommended schnitzels around Sydney. Up until this point Una’s in Darlinghurst held the crown, but I have news.

She has been toppled! This is very controversial I know but please hear me out.

Back in 1980, Neville Wran gave away a parcel of land near Frenchs Forrest. Local European Communities got a patch each and so these clubs were formed. One still very much in action is called The Austrian Club and it is here that you will find the superior schnitzel. Now our family tend to eat Sunday lunch out, normally dumplings or Yum Cha, but yesterday Mr. Woog insisted that we try The Austrian Club. There was very little enthusiasm in the car as we snaked through suburban streets into the middle of butt-fucksville before pulling up in front of an oval in which a game of soccer was being played by elderly gentlemen will heavy European accents.

The restaurant looked, from the outside anyway, a little like that place in Bridesmaids.

I commented to the lads that we were either going to die from food poisoning, or die from food poisoning.

I am pleased to say I remain alive, and well enough to review this strange but magical place.

We opened the door and wandered into this cavernous space filled with tables topped with red and white cloths and paper napkins.

“We have a booking for four under the name Woog…” I called out. A man popped out from behind the bar and welcomed us like we were visitors in his own home. His name was Marc and he was quite possibly the most cheerful man that god gave breath to.

He informed me that he was the President of the Austrian Club and from there, I had a thousand questions for him. Which he patiently answered while pouring me a glass of fine Austrian Beer. This place was a trip!

Could you imagine the patience of the person who is in charge of the price list? Built in the 80’s while retaining the best of the era. The prices were excellent too.

Now a thing to note when ordering from a menu like this, is that the portions are enormous. WHICH IS OK BY ME!

Blew the froth of this and waited for the main event to arrive…

Now when it comes to shnitty, I take a purist approach with a touch of salt and pepper and a generous squeeze across its’ back. It doesn’t photograph well but the delicate flavour of chicken breast which had been pummelled to an even fillet then coasted in delicate crumbs before it has its’ ass fried, well I just about squealed with delight! As we ate, we were joined by more and more families who had obviously been let on on this little secret before.

“This is better than Una’s” Mr Woog said while he shovelled sauerkraut into his cake hole and everyone at the table agreed.

The Austrian Club felt like you were taking a step back in time with its’ themed decor and dedication to the heritage. Why, next to our table was one that was labeled this…

Stammtisch means an informal meeting place for regulars and locals. As the soccer game ended, this table filled up with German speaking gentlemen to discuss the plays of the day over a pint of ale. I was thoroughly charmed by the whole scenario. Yodel-lay-he-ho!

 

And should you feel the need to use the facilities, well you have the opportunity to have a little tinkle before you tickle!

We happily finished our meal off with some crepes.

The bill came to around a hundred bucks which was very reasonable considering the piggy display we put on. When I paid the bill, the friendly waiter got all of the dockets out of the pidgin hole marked TABLE NUMBER TWO and tallied them up the old fashioned way. I have not seen that done for years. Nowadays, the hit TABLE TWO on some fancy cash register which will then spit out an itemised bill. OLD SKOOL MY FRIENDS!

For more information about The Austrian Club and its’ unusual opening hours, please click here

Have you been?

Where is your superior schnitzel from?