When Hormones Collide

40 years ago, the average age of a first time mother was 25. This meant that the time that you had a hormone filled teenager, you would still be a spring chicken at the age of 38. This would mean that there was only ONE unpredictable person in the household, something that I think could be quite manageable.

Cut to 2017, our highest fertility rate (births per female) are those in the 30-34 age bracket.

This blog post is a cautionary tale, not an invitation to slag out older mums or younger mums, it is just a pure mathematical equation that you might not have thought about.

Where was Mother Natures head at when she puts a teenager in the same house as a peri-menopausal, or full-blown menopausal woman? WHAT THE DEVIL WHERE YOU THINKING!

This situation is happening here at Casa Da Woog, where in the right hand corner we have the 14-year-old boy, and in the left hand corner, we have the peri-menopausal 44-year-old woman, who has recently developed a slight case of insomnia.

“LADIES AND GENTLEMAN! LET THE GAMES BEGIN!” DING DING…..

Now, considering that I am the grown up in this match, I think that I need to teach my example, but sometimes I find it really hard to follow the advice from those who have travelled this tricky path before me. Oprah Winfrey, my go to guru, has been replaced by parenting legend Maggie Dent who recently wrote an article that is now my screen saver (and life saver I suspect) You can read the whole thing here. But her advice for us that are ready to drive off a cliff a-la Thelma and Louise style, here is her advice for us.

  1. Lighten up, relax and know that this is just a stage and it will pass.
  2. Keep reassuring your son that his memory will get better.
  3. Use fewer words when reminding him of things – try post-it notes or SMS.
  4. Cook heaps of wonderful nourishing food to keep his mood and body in a good place.
  5. Keep in contact with the school.
  6. Let him fail at school so that he knows how that feels.
  7. Know that being 14 only happens once.
  8. Help him be a good friend as good friends are hugely important!
  9. Keep reminding your son that every choice has a consequence.
  10. Remember he has poor brain functioning and it’s not his fault.
  11. Protect your son from people who use shaming actions and language.
  12. Know your son is very sensitive to emotional wounding despite the mask.
  13. Be a positive lighthouse for your son’s friends and ask their parents to do the same for yours.
  14. Love him unconditionally when he mucks up.
  15. Make him accountable when he mucks up.
  16. Surround your son with fabulous men to be father figures/mentors/stewards.
  17. Know that teen boys can be slow to bloom into manhood.
  18. Many boys find change a challenge and they have brain changes, hormonal changes and physical changes all happening at once!
  19. Write him some “mum notes” ( especially after he mucks up) to remind him that he is a good person and you have faith he will become a good man one day.
  20. Help him find his spark– something outside of his bedroom.
  21. Keep the life skills list nearby and keep working on building what he can do!

Which is all very weak and good, but as Moving Pictures say, WHAT ABOUT ME!

Lets be honest. The oestrogen is leaving the building. This important hormone is scientifically linked with mental health issues. It is why I can be described as snappy, irritable and unpredictable. I am so tired but yet, I cannot sleep. TOO HOT. TOO COLD. NEVER JUST RIGHT! I am mediating like some sort of obsessive sweaty desperate housewife, but even so I sometimes have to apologise to the neighbours for my vocal outbursts.

And so with that cheery little Monday Morning outburst, I am off to take a magnesium tablet and try to write copy for a new client’s website. It is an accountancy firm. THAT SHOULD BE JUST THE CURE FOR MY ILLS!

Does anyone else feel like this right now?

Whats the hormone ration happening at your place?