How to deal when your kids will not stop fighting.

This is a photo that one of my beautiful readers shared on Facebook. It is a picture of her children fighting over who will bring in which bin. They both wanted to bring in the bin with the yellow lid. Seems reasonable.

It has taken a few days for me to recover from our recent beach holiday which was wonderful. Yes, those minutes in between huge fights between the kids were revered, when the only sound was the cricket on the telly and the cicadas in the air. Or I would be in my bliss bobbing around in the ocean when one would decide that this was the perfect time to drown his brother, or whack him in the head with a skim ball, or “dack” him.

“Why can’t we just pretend to be a normal family?” I would hiss hysterically through the side of my mouth.

This is not the first time I have written about arm to arm sibling combat. In fact, you can click here to read something I wrote SEVEN YEARS AGO when I was complaining about their shocking behaviour back then. But recently a double hormone surge has occurred and the fights have become more ridiculous. At the beginning of the summer, I would be the referee and sit them both down to listen to both sides of the story. I would then try to get them to practice empathy, to see the other persons point of view.

I would listen to them explain what happened. Why one of them thought it was a good idea to trip the other one up when carrying a very large smoothie in the kitchen. Why there would be a full on chase through the house because one wore the other ones’ new Adidas t-shirt. Oh, I could go on and on and on.

I would then calm the situation down, they would issue fake apologies and we would move on. For ten or so minutes before the whole thing would start again.

I really need these kids to go back to school.

Now, with their father away for a few weeks, they can sense my weakness. So I have taken a new tact. (This was the WORST possible time of year to quite the ciggies, just as a little FYI) I hear the beginning of an argument and I grab my phone and race into my room. I then drag the chest of drawers across it. It is very heavy. And then I pop in some earplugs and listen to my meditation app. Fucking GENUIS! I only need to listen to a ten minute one before the storm passes, so while they are getting themselves worked up, I am actually doing the opposite! One day, I had 5 sessions! I was particularly zen after that.

Do your kids fight?
Please share how YOU deal with it?