An Opinion – Side Boob Inking

From the blogger who first uncovered the COMFY WOMFY saga and from the very same blogger who discussed what it was like to have fire coming from one’s tits, she has an opinion on the latest beauty trend, and not everyone is going to like it.

During the Neolithic times, someone thought up the idea of tattoos. That was about 10,200 BC, so there is nothing new about it. I once dallied this the notion of getting inked after a day in the sun on a beach in Thailand. Many, many beers later, I watched my friend get one on her hip in a back ally of Phuket and when it was my turn, I sobered up quite quickly and declined my “appointment”.

Many friends and associates have tattoos and I often think that once you get one, you then add to your collection. A couple of years ago, super blogger Constance Hall coined the phrase for her followers as her “QUEENS” and soon, women the world over were getting their own tattoo in homage to Constance and her message. Hell, it even made the news!

Tattoos are such a personal thing, and it was comedian Drake Sather who said “A friend of mine wants to get tattooed with the name of his girl. I told him, marry her, have a few kids, but a tattoo – man, that’s so permanent.”

Fifteen percent of Australians have at least one tattoo. The UK is the worlds most tattooed country. And just when being inked couldn’t get more interesting, enter the sideboob inking. If, like me, you have been watching the smorgasbord of stupid television (and are admitting in public that you do) such has Married at First Sight and Bachelor in Paradise, you might find yourself looking at bouncy breasts, whose sideboob and under cleavage are tattooed!

I always stand by the philosophy of “your body, your business” so HUZZAH for your choices young ladies. But as a more mature woman, the only concern I have for you, and I speak from experience, that if you get a tattoo like this in your twenties…

It is extremely cute and tres whimsical, and a good affirmation for when you get in and out of the shower BUT (and I know I am going to sound old, bitter, judgemental and twisted here) when you are in your mid forties, you may have reproduced and you MAY, just MAY, have to fold your breast in half in front of a mirror to get your daily mantra. I say this with love and coming from a woman who when lies flat, sans bra, by chesticals all but disappear under my armpits, sometimes your boobs change with age.

I recall having a bountiful, bouncy pair of knockers! Oh those glorious few weeks back in 1992 #neverforget. But the truth of the matter is that sometimes gravity is not kind to folk, both men and women, as we age. Sure, you could get the same sentence tattooed across your forehead, but even then, you will need to get your forehead smoothed out every six months or so with botox, or else people will be squinting at you each and every day, trying to literally, read between the lines.

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So go forth, you sweet young things with your brave self expression. Just understand that sometimes, the canvas can warp.

Do you have a tattoo?

How and when did it come about?