The Pyjama Prank

Last Sunday I read the papers and flicked to the horoscopes. Sometimes I believe in this (when the news is good) and sometimes I blow it off as fake news. But last weekend, my horoscope gave me some cause for concern.

You see, it indicated to me that I was on the cusp of cutting free a friendship. Now if there is one thing that I treasure, it is my friendships. They mean the world to me. I have quite a large circle of beloved and trusted mates whom I would walk on fire for. I grabbed my phone and started scrolling through the names, wondering who it was going to be.

No…. No, not her. I would die for her. Nah he’s amazing. She is one of the best people I know.

There was not one person listed that I could live without. The thing about true friendships is that they should be easy, drama free, come without conditions and live on a well-worn two-way street. I have friends who are funny, who are kind, who are generous and who would drop everything in a time of crises. I NEED THEM ALL AND I AM GREEDY.

But yesterday, one of my strongest friendships was tested.

I was out shopping for my good friends upcoming birthday. She, herself, is one of the best gift givers to ever grace the hallowed halls of Chatswood Chase, so I felt a bit of pressure. I had sensibly asked her what she wanted and she sent a link to a pair of fancy-ass pyjamas from a lovely shop that only sold fancy-ass pyjamas. I went straight up to the sales girl and we located the pyjamas in under sixty seconds. Now, for me, I prefer my nightmare oversized so I called my girlfriend to check is she wanted me to size up.

Now, there are two types of people in the world. Those who are interested in the details and those who don’t really care. My mate is a journalist, so she is VERY MUCH INTO THE DETAIL. She started firing off questions at me, and so I said to her…

“I’ll just pop you onto the sales assistant.” which I knew would annoy her but also I knew that she would have the answer to all of the questions.

They had a lengthy chat about said pyjamas before the assistant went silent  as she stood there listening to my friend, her face changing from a pleasant demeanour to one of concern.

Eventually their exchange came to an end and the lass handed me back my phone before scurrying away back to the service desk.

“Hello?” I said to my pal. She went on to thank me for getting her the pyjamas before telling me that she had told the sales assistant to please excuse my rancid breathe, because I cannot help it as it is a side effect of the strong medication I was on, and to beware of the nasty red rash on my hand, because it was VERY contagious.

“You are fucking kidding me….” I hissed into the phone before hanging up on her.

I went over to the sales desk and the girl smiled nervously at me.

“I do not have bad breath and I DO NOT HAVE A CONTAGIOUS RASH ON MY HAND!” holding out my hands for her to inspect. She said that she was trying to find the rash when I was on the phone to my “friend”. And then we had a giggle, I paid the equivalent of a mortgage payment for the PJ’s and went to the news agency to find the most offensive birthday card I could get my rash-free hands on.

We are always pulling this type of shit on each other, but she got me a beauty.

When to comes to friends, how many good ones do you have?

Has a mate ever pulled a prank on you? Discuss!