Gazuntite

Gazuntite is a German word meaning HEALTH and it is supposed to protect you against evil karma after you sneeze.

Sneezing is a sound I hear a lot of, as Mr. Woog and Horatio tend to sneeze a lot due to general hay fever and general revoltingness. They both have the same pattern of SNEEZE SNEEZE PAUSE………. SNEEZE. This is often followed by me screaming at them “Take some bloody Zyrtec already!”

There is actually a part of your brain that is called The Sneeze Centre. When the inside of your nose gets a tickle, a message is sent to your Sneeze Centre for you to deal with that situation. And so you sneeze.

Gazuntite!

I was sitting next to my friend this week when she sneezed, if you could call it that. In fact, is was more like a kitten meowing. It was so tiny and delicate, and so soft and pretty that I actually turned to her and said…

“Is that your actual sneeze?”

She confirmed that it was. Baffling.

When I sneeze, it is like a hurricane has hit. I first notice the tickle and generally have a few seconds to get myself into the brace position. Because my sneezes are EPIC! It is like an explosion and like explosions they are often unpredictable. A particularly violent sneeze can expel solids, liquids and gases from any given orifice of my body. My legs are crossed tightly, THREE TWO ONE THAR SHE BLOWS!

It is embarrassing how loud I am, particularly if I am sitting in the high school hall at parent information night. The hall is a gym and the reverberations and quite something. It is alway a great way to bring attention to ones self. If I am in mid conversation when my Sneeze Centre gets mail, I tend to hold one finger up, to suggest a pause in conversation.

And if you don’t fancy offering a traditional saying after someone sneezes, you can always quip what Jerry Seinfeld does “You’re soooo good-looking.”

Are you a delicate sneezer or a foghorn like me?