Discontinued

Do you remember when Arnott’s changed the recipe of their iconic bikkie BBQ Shapes, claiming that they were now packed with more flavour? Do you remember that most of us lost our tiny little minds because they tasted like ass? Flavourless ass, crunchy cardboard and we protested, with Facebook complaints and even a petition.

Arnott’s were all like “We fucked up. Sorry! Here is the old recipe back. Nothing to see here. Move along people….”

Anyway, Mr. Woog has recently had his own experience of retail disappointment. For as long as I can remember, this product has played a daily part in Mr. Woog’s beauty ritual.

I have absolutely no idea how he even started using this, or why it is so important to him, but he was very dedicated to the practice of never running out of Maca Root Shave Cream. The man doesn’t like change. He doesn’t cope with it well. His existence relies on time-honoured traditions, like a scotch after dinner, or a cup of tea before. Nothing floats his boat more than a Council Clean Up day. He talks to his garden. Twice a year he goes to the same clothes shop and buys 5 identical black v-neck t-shirts so he never has to decide what to wear each day, borrowing the practice of the late Steve Jobs.

So, it was a very dramatic entrance into the house late last week, when he burst through the back door and announced…

“There has been a disaster!”

So I asked, quite alarmingly, what had happened.

He had gone into The Body Shop and could not find his FOR MEN MACA ROOT SHAVE CREAM! The sales girl had to break the news gently. It had been discontinued. But, she was very quick to inform him that it had been replaced with an even better product, which came with a brush! He was quite taken with the brush and gave us all a turn of it…. but the actual product was not, in his opinion, superior than the original one. It was not as good.

It appears that by adding ALOE to the cream has ruined it for him.

And so now, every day, a new shaving product has arrived home with him as he persists in trying to bring back the old magic that Maca Root Shave Cream gave him. I told him that this was something that we, as women, live in fear of each and every day. I still rue the day that Maybelline discontinued my favourite foundation without giving me fair warning to stock up on it. There should be a law that a company must put LIMITED EDITION on any product that they cannot commit to producing for the average lifespan. That being 82.4 years.

I am currently eating the Choc Mint Paddle Pop daily, knowing that at any time, they are going to be taken away from me.

I don’t think that it is too much for these manufacturers to think of their customers, and provide at least some stability in these troubled times.

Can you offer some advice to Mr Woog about an alternative?

What has been discontinued that has caused you disappointment?